beautiful alone

sometimes, you wonder where
you thought you were
when you looked into
the flames you fanned into being
and in the silence
your failure becomes real

sometimes, you wonder who
you wish you were
you tried to be
who you want to be
and are, or aren't
when you realized you were alone
by that fire

sometimes you forget
what you want
and you release your
desire
or maybe not your desire,
but rather your lust, that
grasping desire that wants for self

sometimes you feel the warmth
when the cold breeze begins
to cut into your skin
you turn to the flame with new eyes

sometimes you turn your back
to the fire and
look up at the stars

you see a shooting star
and the red flame of Betelgeuse
in the shoulder of Orion
like a bleeding wound on that great warrior.

you realize,
not for the first time,
you are small.

and you are beautiful,
alone.

Moon Prayer

Why do I forget

the wind is tossing

forget you are here
the moon glows tonight very clearly: you can see the face in it, and the clouds are orange beside it, cotton candy orange
for some reason
the sunset is like a painting, with living colors behind the silhouettes, colors always changing, so vibrant
I look at my life
depressed, as if you left me
behind.
the silence embraces me with clean passion
as if my plans are what I need
and they don't matter to you
the passion is sinking into me, as stars come, now faintly, now brighter against the deep blue of the sky
but then I
let go
the night wind is getting colder and clouds begin to creep in from the south
I confess my sins
the clouds are making shadows in front of the moon, a beauty so subtle, so wild
And looking around me
I hear the hoot of an owl, the smallest noises piercing the silence, life
I let you love me.

In Honor Of A Lost Charger Found

Yep. Today I'm sharing photos. Unfortunately I don't have photos of some of the things I want to share the most, like the sunrises for instance, or for some of the things that happened between the time the charger was lost and found, but hopefully after next week I will have some sunrise pictures, at least. For now, here are a few so we can celebrate. Praise the Lord I found my camera battery charger!

This is the captivating book that I couldn't put down for a week. Unfortunately it is not the last book in the series, which means I have to WAIT for the rest of the story!

THIS is how I feel after a day of working outside when I've forgotten to take benadrill the night before!

This is the dirt moustash I always get. (and a normal I-didn't-forget-the-benadrill face!)

This is the amazing mp3 player that made the days go so fast and my work go so well....until that fateful day...day before yesterday to be exact....when it DIED.

Anyone interested in attending a funeral?

lost things found

So the reason I am free to write this post is that the wind came up alot and I am not able to work outside. Instead, I'm writing scholarship applications today, and, as you can see, blogging. But I wanted to share a small thing with you. A little thing that means alot to me, because it reminds me how intricate God's dealings with us are!

I lost:
mp3 player last July
my camera battery charger
my capo yesterday
my left leather glove worth 12 bucks
my cap
my brush

(the last three out in a field which is like a black hole---you lose it, it's gone!)

I found:
my camera battery charger (after 3 weeks)
my cap
my brush
and my left leather glove (after 3 days)

Isn't God sweet to show me such mercy?! It seems like I always ask Him to help me find stuff and He does! Not that He's my maid, but I love knowing He's interested in every part of my life, even the fact that I'm frustrated with losing things. Not that I'm annoyed with not having them, but I do get annoyed with my losing them!

He knows where the mp3 player and capo are too. Now I wonder...

Tired

OK everyone, just so you all don't feel left out, here's my update.

I've been working.
And I am tired.

So I am going to go to bed, and share life stuff with you later...after the work is done...

Is work ever done?

My Father is greater than all...kickin' down the cobblestones/looking for fun and...love heals your heart

My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me: And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand. My Father, which gave them me, is greater than all ; and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father's hand. I and my Father are one." ~John 10:27-30

"When you think your life is shattered/And there's no way to be fixed again/Love heals your heart//at the time you least expected/You're alive like you have never been/Love heals your heart..." ~ThirdDay

"Slow down, you move too fast/you've got to make the morning last..." ~Simon and Garfunkle, 'Feelin' Groovy'

I'm working out under the beautiful blue sky today. I love it. And in this not-too-warm weather it reminds me how much I love wool! I should spin again, knit again. Soon. Anyway, these are some quotes that sort of describe my life lately....hope you enjoy them. Maybe soon I will be able to write more about the things in my heart. Maybe I will find time(so sparse!), and words. Till then, happy last few days in February!

P.S. I finished reading the book, Brisingr, and it left me frustrated, because the story isn't finished and now no other book satisfies. Any suggestions out there for a riveting story I could read?

My Very Favorite Rhett&Link Song Ever (It's hillarious!) (At least, I'M laughing!!)